Take this straw man!

Within the past few months I have found myself in several lively discussions over various theological topics. What has made several of them so lively is that the other person in the conversation has argued against views that I don't actually hold. How do you defend yourself against something you don't even believe?
Even now I struggle to explain what I mean. There is a rhetoric tactic known as the “straw man” fallacy where the arguer misinterprets an opponent’s position for the purpose of more easily attacking it, demolishing the misinterpreted argument, and then proceeding to conclude that the original argument has been demolished. A good example of this is in The DaVinci Code where Dan Brown, through his fictional characters, sets up a straw man position for the inspiration of scripture that he easily demolishes, a position of belief the church has never historically held. (I need to read a good book on refuting the false claims in The DaVinci Code, as it comes to theaters May 19th, 2006)
Most often my debates/discussions centers on God's sovereignty in salvation and man’s will. Several views I’m often accused of holding are that God is dragging some people into heaven who don’t want to go and excluding some who do, or perhaps that I am saying people have no will of their own at all and are not morally responsible for their rejection of Jesus Christ, or that people are somehow just robots in my view of scripture, just to name a few off the top of my head. Another list might include that I supposedly believe there is no need for evangelism, or that the only reason a Christian of the Reformed faith might evangelize would be simply out of obedience to Christ’s commands, but never out of love. (I do it for both…why just one or the other?)
I understand why they assume I hold such views, as I myself assumed others who hold a Reformed view of the Gospel believed some of those things a couple years back. But when someone told me “No, I don’t believe that” I would ask what it is they do believe.
So, let’s get down to it. Does man have free will? Yes. Man has the capacity to choose what he desires most. I wholeheartedly concur that “whosoever believes will not perish but have eternal life.” That is the historic position of the Reformers. The real question is what do people do with their free will? That whosoever is huge, but just as huge is scriptures answer given 3 verses later: “And this is the condemnation, that the light has come into the world, and men loved darkness rather than light, because their deeds were evil. 20 For everyone practicing evil hates the light and does not come to the light, lest his deeds should be exposed.” (John 3:19-20) Men (that’s all unsaved men and women) are unwilling. That just seems about hopeless. But verse 21 gives hope: “But he who does the truth comes to the light, that his deeds may be clearly seen, that they have been done in God.”
In a nut shell: God outwardly calls all men with the Gospel message, which we are commanded to take to all the earth. Turning from your sins to Christ in faith is the requirement. No one is willing to do that on their own, as men’s hearts are bent toward evil. As Ezekiel 11:19-20 says “Then I will give them one heart, and I will put a new spirit within them, and take the stony heart out of their flesh, and give them a heart of flesh, that they may walk in My statutes and keep My judgments and do them; and they shall be My people, and I will be their God.” (Ezekiel 36:26-27 repeats it again for emphasis) We are morally responsible to obey and trust God in faith, but unable to, and so God must give us a new heart inclined to obey Him, a.k.a. the new birth/born again. God himself provides the requirements for whomever he has chosen, not arbitrarily, but according to the counsel of His will. For more good info and exegesis of scripture visit www.monergism.com
Anyways, I guess the best way to correct people’s misunderstanding of what you believe is to simply keep stating what it is you do believe until they can’t say you believe anything else, and then maybe they will try to understand what it is you believe…and maybe just believe it themselves!